laguardia airpot to get an (expensive, unnecessary) facelift

words team [wherever]

One of the few major, international airports that is not a vast shopping mall (I'm looking at you, JFK Airport) or an impossible labyrinth (cough, Charles de Gaulle Airport) that takes an hour of your life to maneuver with a heavy suitcase in tow ("No, thank you, I don't want cigarettes, or chocolates, or Dior sunglasses"), LaGuardia Airport is about to get a massive, expensive, and unnecessary facelift to turn it into a twenty-first century facility.

"LaGuardia is slow. It's dated. It is a terrible front door entranceway," said New York Governor Andrew Cuomo during his announcement of the $4 billion project.

The entranceway is an historic, "old-fashioned Marine Air Terminal that opened in 1940 as landing base for the great flying boats like the two-decker Pan Am Clipper," writes John Mariani for the Huffington Post. "It was designed by the architectural firm of Delano and Aldrich in a distinctly 1940s art déco style within a circular room containing a 235-foot long Social Realist mural by James Brooks (1906-1992) titled Flight and a bust of Mayor Fiorello LaGuardia."

History is getting scrapped so, for now, enjoy the last moments of being able to both print your boarding ticket and get to security in under ten minutes. Savor that brisk, five minute walk to Gate 76. Once construction starts in 2016, we're looking at four to five years of hammering and sawing if all goes according to schedule (which, these things never do).

In the meantime, four of the terminals will be consolidated into one and the entire airport will be moved 600 feet to the south—just so you can hit up the Dunkin' Donuts before going to the L'Occitane shop and then the Victoria's Secret, before settling into the Wok & Roll. Dior sunglasses? No, thank you.

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